Spring Theory

i’m exhausted,

spun out of control, like the world facing the end. i crawl out of bed, obeying a theory not yet disproven. as if the world was flat,

as if schrödinger’s cat started whistling and gave the answer away;

my leg aches, my lungs heavy, my mind wide awake. and i keep on running in circles i don’t dare comprehend. as if running out of breath could save me now—

and then there’s spring and light and easiness,

but i’ve forgotten how to blossom, i only water the rotten roots and pretend to be in full bloom

i guess i’ve forgotten that i am
alive

within this maddening polarity
i feel light as a feather

instead of weighed down by fear.